Adversity points you to your calling and helps you to master it

Hello friends,

hope the weekend was good. I’m aware that the number of people going to funerals is growing. Now the news is becoming more frequent. Hang in there, there are far more worst situations, consider yourself blessed to have come so far in your life and for not taking your life for granted.

I thought of this title today because yes, I was that person complaining about adversities while I was in them, yes, I had to learn how to welcome them, yes, I had to learn how to harness them, yes, I had to go through them (no shortcuts and as we all know no adversity is easy), yes, I had to stay still to understand why it has come to me and yes, the part that we all miss often is, what is it here to teach us?

This is why I think a lot about people who commit suicide. Why I think about this, comes from this. This is what I would tell a person who thinks it’s the end of the world. I was there, would you not call it the end of the world when you think that all you have earned in your life (mainly reputation) was sabotaged by one wrong person who shouldn’t have walked into your life or that you allowed to go this far with you? Would you not call it the end of the world when you don’t know how to tell people even the ones closest to you that you’ve been set up, how can you prove it? It’s a crazy statement in itself? It’s usually seen as the immigrant setting people up. To end up feeling that one person has turned and assisted in making your psychological state break down over years so that they can bring you to a point where you think that everyone believes you are the bad one, including your own close family circle? It’s not like people are going to say it to your face what they think especially if all the fingers are pointing at you. If ever I felt one hundred percent cheated with life, one hundred percent alone, and how I’ve come to the point where the parts and people that built my life out of authenticity didn’t even know who I was and if I was the same person they knew or that girl walking to school with all her dreams in her head not knowing how she was going to get there, honestly? Check out this and this. I wrote these, they’re based on a true story. This person had died or was even wiped out of people’s minds. I bought the false reality too, that she’s dead to me too. This one was the worst, “If everyone thinks I’m bad, I must really be bad.”

Six months after leaving the relationship with my ex-partner I wanted to commit suicide, after public defamation, a picture with nasty words put on a Facebook page of the town I was born in and grew up in where most people I know were on it. For me this was the icing on the cake added with workplace bullying, visiting the lawyer and contacting the police forever, going back and forth with the translation’s company for documents, undoing what problems the ex-caused online on my social proof, changing my phone number several times as well as my email addresses and then stalking me while on the job where I had to use Skype for work. I had to close down all the channels and get off the grid which affected my jobs where I was required to build connections on LinkedIn, be visible and show my superiors that they hired the right person, doing all the things employees in IT and tech sales needed to do to bring in business. Not being able to keep up with this you kind of seen as I don’t know, maybe boring? The outsider? Because people don’t know much about you or think you don’t want to share your life with them. Maybe lazy? Maybe because you’re not showing your dedication for the company and the heights/extent you’re willing to go to. Who knows, but I wasn’t seen as very vibrant in my jobs. For me, I was just plain old tired of everything, everything.

There was one person I thought I made a friend of in those six months, but then when she went to say that this all that was happening to me was because of Karma which didn’t help me telling myself already, “You must be the bad one if all the fingers are pointing at you being the bad one.”

Now the questions the police asked seven years ago only made sense four months later after I removed myself off that person who was very toxic to my life. When I made the call to the police and through the whole process the questions they took me through didn’t make sense to me, I didn’t feel the answers to them or the questions they asked me was fit to my profile or what was going on, they were (the questions) confusing, I only felt the effects of what they knew which was better than what I knew only four months later. I was asked almost thirty questions that were standard more than once in my first two months of being in contact with the police because I was constantly being blasted by my ex all over through different channels of communication, he even got people I knew to get in touch with me and forced them to force me to connect back with him, by the way, blasting me through various forms of communication went on for quite long (you’d know if you’ve been reading all my articles).

How much longer do you need to hear that from yourself, “You must be the bad one” and from someone else telling you that this is your karma?

Now the sad story you read up there, if you’re reading this and knew me while we were in our twenties, maybe one day you’ll be inclined to leave a comment on here. You knew me, you knew that this person in the paragraphs being discussed above is someone totally different than who you once knew. This was not the way she lived her life and won’t ever consider taking suicide seriously.

This is what I really want to tell people who are thinking about committing suicide. It’s not karma, not all things are attached to the word “Karma,” especially when you know you didn’t do anything wrong, or that you didn’t do anything to hurt someone else mostly intentionally. If this is you, then call this adversity. That’s it, do the self-check and gut-check, if you believe it’s karmic then change the meaning to adversity (breakdown) if this is what will get you through (breakthrough) it so that you can become a better person creating more positive karma in the future. Whether it’s karmic or not call this “Adversity,” and consider the lesson of Karma if that is what you’re having right now as over, for once and for all.

Why adversity points you to your calling

No matter how bad it is, your life is worth more, always, only you don’t know that when adversity hits you. What in the world could be so bad, so bad that the negative believes it’s won over the positive, i.e. it gets to consume the positive? What could be so bad, so bad that the negative gets to win? Do not let the negative win! – T. Dench Patel, 10 August 2020, 17:19 I want to tell people who consider or take suicide seriously that what you’re doing is you’re giving up before the miracles even happen. You have to be realistic about your timings and adversity will help you strengthen yourself over time with regards to “timings,” in your life, until that timing is accurate you are being led to your calling but that doesn’t mean that’s an excuse to wallow in and stick around extending your adversity. – T. Dench Patel, 10 August 2020, 17:05

• In this world, we have people who have become lawyers after seeing their parents going through something which affected them through adversity, today (hard to believe), but there are lawyers who do a great job (I wish I met more of them).
• In this world, we have women sitting on panels of some well-known organisations protecting women’s rights, creating equality, saving lives because something in their adversities pulled them to take this direction in their life.
• In this world, we have people who had false beliefs about the talents they were given only to betray themselves almost whenever they chose something else but themselves and their talents living a life so unauthentic that nothing worked out until they finally chose themselves and their talents (purpose).
• In this world, we have people who became scientists because they wanted to save more people from an illness after they felt so hopeless when they couldn’t save someone they loved dearly.

In this world, we have everything amongst us on different levels, the authentic and unauthentic, but you are one of seven and a half billion that is why your adversity is yours, because there is only one person with a unique life experience like yours otherwise we all might as well become nurses, scientists, doctors, accountants, etc. – T. Dench Patel, 10 August 2020, 17:35

When purpose and past adversities make you so passionate that you want to make a career out of it, that, my friend, is known as a calling. Pick up the call. – T. Dench Patel, 10 August 2020, 17:39

Adversity helps you to master your calling

What do you do during adversity? Committing suicide is an escape, it’s called quitting, quitting before the miracles can even take place. We have to detach ourselves from instant gratification. So, what do most people and leaders do through adversity? They become stronger, they build the muscle and threshold of patience, tolerance, resilience, faith, hope, optimism, practises, enlightenment through seeking information, and the more adversities they have, go through them the more knowledge they have of the “know-how,” i.e. to get through various situations and even find various solutions. You can even call adversity failing because failing leads you to better success each time if you harness its teachings correctly. You know this, no leader was perfect, leaders are born through adversities/failures, and so what does that make you…?

A leader!

So, when you look at your dream board, in your head, to where you see yourself when you’re twenty, twenty-six, thirty-five, forty-two, forty-eight, fifty-one, fifty-eight, sixty-one etc. where do you see you transitioning to and to what?

So, see why the adversity is going to be gone, see that same adversity is unlikely going to follow you until you die, the person, thing, source, situation, event/events can’t control itself for that long. It’s building you and leading you all the time, and by welcoming it, seeing and taking on what it’s trying to teach you, you begin self-mastery and do what you’re called on this planet to do, and to successfully do what you’re called to do on this planet requires self-mastery. Why? Because leaders lead by example.

Lastly, you deserve to be happy, you deserve a wonderful life and if right now your life doesn’t look like the way you want it to look, begin now. Create such a wonderful life, where you choose yourself fiercely, ferociously and the life you’ve manifested with the work that you’ve put into it changing it for the better continuously. Be the winner, for you because it’s your life to won sorry own, win and won until death chooses you. – T. Dench Patel, 10 August 2020, 19:57

Yours sincerely,

T. Dench Patel

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Note: Do keep referring back to this site as much as possible, as I grow, a more profound perspective may form and so I will always come back to each of these articles to re-evaluate them.