I don’t believe South Africans or people in third world countries have ever had the opportunity of living and understanding the term “Safe Space”

Hello friends,

hope all is great at your end. I don’t read the news but when it comes to the subject of domestic violence, social and spiritual issues that resonates to me or some kind of injustice that I am familiar with, what hits a nerve, or if I happen to be the first one there then you’d find me on top of it like I am on top of this right now.

Looking at the list of topics for discussion today that I wrote down over two weeks ago, the topic “Safe space” stood out. I remembered why I wrote this topic down. I wrote it down as I kept observing the increase in the numbers when it comes to domestic violence not only in South Africa but in the world since the lockdown began. Now, it’s Argentina too in the news. Argentina has reached a ten-year high during COVID in terms of the killing of women. In Latin America, twelve women are killed every day for being women under the crime known as femicide i.e. gender-based discrimination. I specialize in this topic because of this, and this reason.

You know the more I put on my lens, read some statistics around domestic violence, come across something I’m not really looking for, but it found me Gender-based violence – alcohol, violence, and murders in South Africa or this one again which I wasn’t looking for but added a lot of substance to this current article that I am writing Femicides in Argentina rising under COVID lockdown it made me change the title of this article that was just originally set to South African lifestyle. Ever since I arrived in South Africa, now, it’s already one year and a half, I have had my ears, eyes, nose, mouth, open (eyes, nose, and mouth especially when it comes to food ? :D). Being around entrepreneurs I always keep hearing the words “safe space” which when I look at most homes in South Africa, most workplaces (not only in South Africa but around the world), most schools, universities, or community centres/gatherings, and even over twenty years ago, nothing such as a “safe space” existed/exists especially in South Africa. This is a new practice which I am certain when people get it, they will realise why it should be implemented in the corporate world and personal lives of people, maybe when families understand what is a “safe space,” that being human is a privilege and it deserves the right to abide by moral codes, it actually is a human right no matter how familiar or tight you are with someone. This is the start of domestic violence decreasing in homes around the world.

What is a safe space according to the Oxford dictionary?

A safe space is a place or environment in which a person or category of people can feel confident that they will not be exposed to discrimination, criticism, harassment, or any other emotional or physical harm.

I would add that in the time and place where people gather under a safe space, no judgement whatsoever is expected to be cast onto someone, otherwise, it defeats its purpose. A safe space permits you to be vulnerable without being taken advantage of.

Why South Africa, other third world countries, and the rest of the world need to practise this more?

In South Africa, there is massive distance and tension with Hindus and Muslims still to this day and yet they fall under one race i.e. Indian (I am not going into what and why), there is massive tension with all races and people of all races are very angry. Again, the political system and division it’s creating are causing resentment, anger, hate, violence, etc. Native South African Africans themselves say they do not feel safe and free in South Africa even more now than under apartheid. Why? Because even black lives amongst the South African native race (black lives) does not even matter today. South Africa is always coming under fire with speculations around going into civil war, workplaces are tense and there is no pressure release button (safe spaces) to get out what you want out of your system without someone judging you all the time or taking what you say personally. Now with COVID, it’s become worse. The circle just goes round i.e. dog eat dog. This is why there is hardly any regard for human life in third-world countries. Having a safe space means that you can ask for change in a way where there is no pressure, where the odds and numbers are not against you i.e. a neutral arena. A place to have your say without being attacked or judged, a place that not necessarily has to be about change but just releasing something you’ve been bottling up inside of you before it eats at you or becomes bigger than you. A place to see if the vote is higher on the feeling or if it’s just you who is feeling this, or a place where you can get more clarity.

Let’s face it, the systems are collapsing with this (COVID) that most of us have never seen anything akin to this in history. Perhaps, the games can stop and it’s a good time to perhaps change gears in the direction of authenticity, compassion, understanding, and kindness. We all know that it’s hard to be authentic and breakthrough judgements and hierarchy in the workplace with genuine care even with the so-called “safe space,” needless to say, companies with really great ethics do incorporate it and have found success, for example, Nokia.

Although the safe space has controversies which you can read about here  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Safe_space I agree in terms of people’s journeys like in the case of my own story, that it would have been very heavy to swallow at the first instance when you just begin a new job and face the challenges that come with that, not only that I think to start a job where most people have been in already, say from three years and upwards puts a person in a very vulnerable position in the sense that you only find out who you’re working with for real when you’re in a situation or carrying out a task that involves numerous people. This could very likely end up being a positive or negative experience, and not all people in the corporate world are “playing” authentically.

What are your thoughts?

Yours sincerely,

T. Dench Patel

Another article from last week which is still doing well with reads is this one Self-love vs self-worth.

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