Hello friends,
hey there, all good?
I’m a bit used to staying at home, but I must say I’m missing just taking a drive round the block. The funny thing is that I’m used to working from home without thinking about going out, it’s only when you can’t go out is when you think about it, anyways, just look after yourself.
So, I had some topics written down to write about but the reason why I didn’t write about one of them was that the content wasn’t really shining through so I decided to listen to some wisdom from Oprah’s vision tour and was drawn to a woman named Tracee Ellis Ross. Maybe you already know her, but I didn’t know who she was, only when I came somewhere close to half-way through the talk. She’s Diana Ross’ daughter.
Wow, you know it’s the first time I really paid attention to an account from someone who was a child of a famous singer, okay no longer a child as she is 47 years old. I can see now how hard it’s for some famous people’s children to get into something that they really passionate about, even talented in, even if it’s similar to what their parents do. I can see, how judgement can be even stronger to them. They too seek respect and what has become evident to me is that Tracee Ellis Ross really wanted to pave her own success. This has brought me to think about some people I knew in my youth who came from wealthy families, one lady, in particular, told me that people said she got the role simply by being the boss’ daughter and people in the roles beneath her were resentful.
Harsh both ways, whether you’ve got parents with contacts or not, the judgement and the struggle is all the same. I mean there were tons of subjects that came up from the talk which you can take a look at here, but I picked out this topic; the fastest way to where you want to go is through where you are but there’s a but to that, the space between where you want to go and where you are is the scary bit.
This is the interesting bit that I’ve picked up as I use affirmations. The affirmations usually begin with I am, but what Tracee talks about in the talk is that the scary bit for her is often the space between where she is to where she wants to be. For example, say you want to be a singer, she poses the question, “May I know if I am a singer,” instead of saying “I am a singer”. This is a gentle invitation while honouring her where she is and then gently moving her way there.
What have I picked up from the talk?
How much is conditioning and how much is really you?
Like when she speaks about conditioning, speaking gently and soft with a smile or the way to laugh etc, or her hidden dream to sing but instead decided to make a comedy out of it when she would get up and sing as a kid if she was asked to, that is.
It’s really important the words we use and the words we say to ourselves. That is why I read when I can, listen to an audiobook when I can, watch motivational videos or listen to talks. This changes the thinking pattern; it might even give you an epiphany or aha moment, which might be what you need to get from where you are to where you want to be.
These were some epiphanies that came through for me
“What tape are we running in our minds?”
“We can make choices not just externally for ourselves but to what matches that very quiet voice in our hearts.”
“I was taught to grow up dreaming of my wedding, not of my life and I spent many years dreaming of my wedding and also waiting to be chosen. Well, here’s the thing, I’m the chooser and I can choose to get married if I want to but, in the meantime, I am choice-fully single, happily, gloriously single. I do wish there were more examples.”
“He’s going to be a really good hugger, that I feel safe, that he’s trustworthy, that we equal partners, and there’s equity in our relationship, and we both get to negotiate our partnership not by the standards of what the culture says, but instead to what is important to us about connection and relationship.”
“I wanted to feel worthy enough to be asked and the day he asked me I started to feel like, Oh God what does it really mean to be married?”
“Married to my own life… walk in what I had created and built… being the leads in our lives …but somehow don’t get the moment of recognition.”
“Sometimes what I think of myself is none of my business.”
It’s nice to surprise yourself sometimes by picking something to listen to not knowing what to expect and who the person is/was that will be sharing it.
That’s me for today ladies and gentlemen,
Over and out.
Yours sincerely,
T. Dench Patel
Thank you for the comments and support. Thank you for offering to donate if there was a donate button on here. I prefer not to take donations. You can support by either purchasing one of my books (Paperback or Kindle), The South African: True Colours, The South African: Roamer or my children’s book Light. These books can be found on Amazon mainly and other sites in your country.
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Note: Do keep referring back to this site as much as possible, as I grow, a more profound perspective may form and so I will always come back to each of these articles to reevaluate them.
