Hello friends,
hope you are well. What! The last article of this week. No way! Where did the week go? Another Christmas with you! Wow! And that’s next week already.
Have you given away your power slowly without knowing, only to realise that the external world is dominating your value and not you?
Christmas is almost here, so let’s get back your superpowers superstars…
I am guessing you are super busy, so in case you miss forthcoming articles let me wish you an amazing festive season, and Christmas in advance. I got a feeling, maybe a Christmas star told me that the year two thousand and twenty-one is going to be awesome.
Okay, let me make this article good…
Not sure why this topic only came up now, it links to most articles which I write about when it comes to self-improvement and self-help. Almost anything one does in life, i.e., your job, being a mum (single, in partnership or marriage), the relationship with the significant other, relationships, I mean everywhere one goes, relationships are very important be it in business, divine intervention of two people meeting for reasons we will never know … almost anything we do will require us to have our personal power and value. We may well get our foot in the door or looking to get somewhere (whatever the goal is) … there is always that perceived value of others onto us and then our value of what we “think” of ourselves.
What if I tell you that majority of the time, we undervalue ourselves …? Who is going to tell us the truth? We can wait for that day forever or we can really just believe we are worth what we’ve settled for or what we’re about to settle for? This is the question of the mind (you are what you believe – just being one hundred percent honest) but what if you’ve settled for rubbish? A place in your life where you are very unhappy, a place in your life where you are undervalued, a place in your life where you are being taken for granted (for years), a place in your life where your self-worth and self-esteem has been eroded? Then this is when we really must ask ourselves have we given away our power slowly without knowing, only to realise that the external world is dominating our value and not us?
The way to determine if we have given away our power slowly without knowing, only to realise that the external world is dominating our value and not us is by identifying what we’re choosing, that is not aligned to us? What are we choosing that we don’t like? What are we choosing that is coming from fear? Are we choosing something else because of self-sabotage? Are we choosing continuously the suggestion that is second from the first suggestion which the inner voice has given? Are we choosing ourselves first and foremost (there is a false belief that this is selfish, what if I suggest in a non-narcissist way especially when it’s clear that one isn’t a narcissist that we are not selfish) and that it’s choosing self-love first and foremost? How can one give any worth, value to oneself if love cannot be given first?
Love to yourself, kindness to yourself, understanding to yourself, patience to yourself, treating yourself, forgiving yourself, dreaming for yourself, compassion, doing what fulfils you for yourself, etc. Doesn’t’ this feel full, whole so that we can pour it over onto others and in other areas of our life? Does this not feel healthier than feeling like one is getting further and further away from the beat of their own drum. Is your heart beating for you? Or is your heart beating for someone else? Who owns you now? I am going to repeat these questions to you. Is your heart beating for you? Or is your heart beating for someone else? Who owns you now?
Only you can answer this, and so, how does this make you feel?
In a previous life (let me put it that way) someone said to me, “I was going to be alone; no one will want to be with me.” I was told this almost every second to five days, I have no idea when it was first said to me, but I can remember it went on for three years. I should have asked the person, “And who will want to get to know a person that says this or even brings a sentence like this in every important ‘conversation’ or disagreement? Wouldn’t you be the person that would be alone; no one will want to be with if you go around drilling this nasty sentence in other people’s heads?” When we have given away our power slowly without knowing, only to realise that the external world is dominating our value and not us there has been many things that have taken place in the mind, body, spirit and soul to have made a person come this far in not believing in their own capabilities, dreams and worth so sticking to what one knows best is easier than to take a risk at one’s dreams at becoming the drummer of one’s own heartbeat. What would be the risk for you? If you love so much, love will support you on this massive, loaded question, right?
You know what is the greatest problem when one is spiritual, grateful, believing in God, an optimist and still accepts being treated like a doormat? One sees the positive in the most devastating situations. Let me explain what this means.
This means that the self-sabotage makes a person believe they’re lucky, they see the positive in the situation having given up on themselves and their dreams and take the minimum good they receive. Some days go great and the days that are the hardest are the days that feel like hell. Self-sabotage compensates this because the optimistic side of the person says, “Today will be gone and done with, tomorrow this will not exist,” but what happens when it’s back again? It’s not going to go until a person chooses themselves, their heartbeat, believe that they are an awesome drummer to live life through and by their own heartbeat.
I wonder if I should have given this article the title “Are you the drummer of your heartbeat or is someone else the drummer of your heartbeat?”
Take back your drum, get back your drumstick, flap, wing it, follow the waves of your percussions and watch yourself fly. You are no trapped chicken on some farm! – T. Dench Patel, 17 December 2020, 16:33 – disclaimer – firstly, assess if your relationship is toxic, i.e., your dreams and life is at risk.
Yours sincerely,
T. Dench Patel
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