Hello friends,
May God/Source/Universe bless you all and if you are sick be one of those in the majority that recovers from this.
I can see people around me talking to me but are not one hundred percent with me. Am I in the comfort zone? Are you in a comfort zone? Yes and no, some of us are at home and some of us have been forever working from home, it now feels. People are worried about how they are going to bring in income for the next couple of months. Can we do anything? I believe we can only do what is in our control and begin practising what worked before when there were previous crises.
These are some of the things I’ve learnt when I came out of the relationship from domestic violence in the year 2013 with roughly 400 pounds in my pocket.
- I prayed to God/Universe/Source or whatever you want to call it. My friends: a couple helped me with the break-up, pack-up and run. My friends helped me get well, I was very sick. She made me this garlic and ginger grind (yuck), but it was making me strong and it certainly boosted my immune system. I was in bed for 10+ days, couldn’t get up. The body basically collapsed as soon as I broke off with my then ex-partner and still had to deal with the drama in the coming days after the break-up.
- After getting better I had to quickly start a new job and believe it or not I had to find a place to rent for 250 pounds and then with the letters that came to my door that my ex-partner got sent to me I had no time to sit and cry, I had to find a lawyer immediately. Not to mention, if there is someone here reading this article and saw the tiny room I lived in with the conditions of the house then feel free to leave a comment.
- I prayed to God/Universe/Source or whatever you want to call it and asked for help, I was ready to return to my country, then to live through the drama and all the emotional hardcore punches from my ex-partner. Will you believe this? God sent, I found a lawyer who was ready to take my 100 pounds deposit and she began working on my case. She said I can pay her over time as I earn money from my new job. Then lastly, I kept the last £50 for food until payday. The first month of independence straight after recouping in those ten days.
- Five months later from the day I paid £100 to the lawyer and starting the new job, I was facing new things I’ve never faced before. Work bullying by more than ten people, mainly women, stalked by the ex-partner, defamation by him as well, anxiety, panic attacks, part of my hand still releasing sweat (never before had I had to deal with such challenging physical and bodily reactions at once) having to change email addresses and phone numbers at least two or three times. My world as I knew it was crashing for the second time after leaving him. Not to mention a court case was coming up where I was told there was no saying I could win because the law did not support unmarried non-EU partners to an EU partner even with or without domestic violence. I started to meditate. Take a look at this article that explains how meditation save my life How meditation saved my life.
- Acceptance came straight after I started to meditate, weirdly enough God/Universe/Source wasn’t done with me yet, it didn’t give up on me even though I thought I was done with me and just when I was ready to give up one door after another kept opening. – T. Dench Patel, 20 March 2020, 16:27 Here is where I learnt what is meant to be will be, that if I am meant to go back home then when the time comes, I will accept that. The case kept rolling on.
- In times of crisis be glad to find out people’s true colours; the good friends, the ones you thought were your friends, the colleagues, the boss, the money grabbers (yep including the businesses still calling you in times of crisis to sell you things unethically). I just received a message today on my phone with a picture of a van and its number plate saying, “These people are going around houses pretending they’re from a power company and they’re also pretending to be part of a COVID 19 squad and once people let them in their houses they end up robbing them.” Someone said yesterday that the passion-driven business they’ve built has brought them a few problems because of spiteful people who are resentful.
- Belief – Believe that all this is helping you become a better version of yourself, it’s happening to pave the path for a better future even if you can’t see that right now. A belief that you (in my case I never cheated or hurt anyone while I tried to get a better life) deserve good, you deserve better and to see the rainbow it has to rain sometimes. I believe there’s a quote for this one, “If you want the rainbow, you have to deal with the rain” – John Green. Time like this belief is so tested, people’s belief in you, especially if they’ve invested money in you or your service, people’s true belief about you is often revealed, you know when the going gets tough the tough literally gets going… depends how you want to read that line, there’s a double meaning there. Belief in the higher powers are really going to get tested, your faith will get tested. So, the question is, how much do you really believe?
- Let go – Let it rain, let it hail, let the hurricane spin around you and sit there like the eye of the hurricane and watch, sit still and watch it all go round around you. No reaction, no taking on other people’s baggage, let it expel. Be calm, keep calm, and remain watchful. It’s a practice I’ve learnt when I began meditating. Let the inner baggage you carry leave you, let it get swept away with the hurricane and let the hurricane expel it. T. Dench Patel, 20 March 2020, 17:05
- Time to enjoy nature – Now that the humans are under quarantine, I am seeing posts where people are saying that they are noticing the birds, seeing dolphins. Venice is seeing clear canal water, which was never seen in 60 years, the fish are visible, swans have appeared, and dolphins have been spotted in southern Italy. Air pollution has dropped, ducks in the fountains in Rome.
- Make the most – Let the hurricane pass until it passes pass your time well through self-care, self-love, practices, hobbies, positivity, and things you never finished on your to-do list. When was the last time you’ve been this much with your family? When was the last time someone needed your help so much? When was the last time you looked within and reset the focus outwards? Besides, my mentor recommends the following: – Invest in yourself, diversify your skills, upskill and reskill, be empathetic and seek to serve others, you might find that you intuitively will be lead to do what suits you and your family in this time.
Can you think of anything else? Leave a comment.
Yours sincerely,
T. Dench Patel
Thank you for the comments and support. Thank you for offering to donate if there was a donate button on here. I prefer not to take donations. You can support by either purchasing one of my books (Paperback or Kindle), The South African: True Colours, The South African: Roamer or my children’s book Light. These books can be found on Amazon mainly and other sites in your country.
The audiobook for The South African: True Colours is available on iTunes, Apple and Audible. The South African: Roamer and Light will be released soon.
Note: Do keep referring back to this site as much as possible, as I grow, a more profound perspective may form and so I will always come back to each of these articles to reevaluate them.
