Category Archives: T. Dench Patel’s Blogs

Emotional bankruptcy

To reach emotional bankruptcy a person would slowly be debiting their “trust account”. This person will always have emotional conflicts i.e., cannot share with others, express themselves to others, or process their emotions and repress them to such an extent that it manifests as an illness. Basically your “emotional account” could be healthy, abundant or sitting at a minus. How this may come out in a person’s relationship could be in a form of dishonesty, disrespect, blaming, ghosting, petty or betraying, threatening, blackmailing… basically decreasing the “trust” fund.

Are you the solution or are you part of the problem?

Then I was on an interview with a very interesting guy, named Gary when this actual sentence, i.e., Are you the solution or are you part of the problem? came up in my answer. He asked a question I answered. So, I was literally working on my books and I followed certain processes automatically or so to say intuitively. I ended up going into writing, healing and purpose. Something that I knew but didn’t know how deeply I sifted it out that it literally took the first two novels, i.e., The South African: True Colours and The South African: Roamer both based on true stories ten years in the making until I released them. I didn’t even know the depth of why until I was asked a question by Gary which you will soon come to know and have a chance to listen to. You’d need to wait for that interview to be released. Watch out on all my social media channels for that update, however, you will get a hint on this article.

“De la sartén al fuego”- translation “From the frying pan to the fire” but have you ever thought…?

You know, let’s face it…If you’re jumping from the fire to the frying pan the heat is supposed to be low right? … my frying pans were on high and that’s not how it works, the point is, it should go down considerably less … why not jump into the familiar, right, where all the pigs are sitting together in their blankets happy and merry? (pigs in blankets is a popular meal during Christmas). What now? First, I call you a pig, your significant other a devil, then I’m advising you to be calm and act like Dory, then I’m calling that one an angel… woooo… flounder is getting upset… hahah just playing, once upon a time I was a pig stitched up in a blanket, right now people are either like flounder, Dory but one thing for sure is that there is an angel to all of us as well as a devil and it depends which one is dominant.

Detach self-regard even when you know your inadequacies – Jordan Peterson

If you act in accordance with your highest values, sometimes that makes your day-to-day operations difficult, because you have to confront unpleasant truths. You’d have to discuss things that you’d rather avoid. It would be easier to act to decrease conflict in the moment, but it’s a very bad medium to long term strategy. You have to engage in a certain amount of conflict moment to moment if you are going to say and do the things that are necessary in order to set things right in the medium to long term and for an increasing large number of people and that’s also another guide to leadership, I would say. You need a broad scale vision.”

The Brutal Truth or The Hard Truth

How do you first get to know the person? Connection, and some sort of a link, i.e., a reason how come you’re connected and naturally they keep showing up in your life. The more they keep showing up, the more you will understand the type of person you are being connected to, their past, their success, their struggle, them overcoming obstacles, etc. This is why you got celebrities, role models with so many followers behind them, yes, connection. Something about them and their connection, their magical attraction to so many people following. Giving, demonstrating, without even knowing the answers themselves, just living true, then let what happens later reveal the revelation. This is a time thing, this is a brutal truth learnt the brutal way, and a human experience in front of so many people to take what they need to excel in whatever way they believe, this is true for both; the person watching and the person going through it. We just don’t know how the whole thing comes together later on.

How much do you want to bet?

Alright, how much do you want to bet that the most positive leaders or successful people out there have been in some deep trenches before they’ve harnessed those learnings to get to where they are today? How much you want to bet that the person taking the most abuse in a relationship where there is domestic violence is the most positive person? How much do you want to bet that the most positive person until they see it for themselves are the ones who will stay in the most unfortunate of circumstances without leaving? Why? And why do some of these people never end up harnessing their full potential?

How magic works? When you feel WHOLE. This is when everything works out effortlessly

we have broken down and fragmented that which once fragmented us, we know how to deal with it as soon as it reaches our doorstep, yes, that which once consumed out self-confidence, self-belief, self-worth, self-value, patience, shame, dignity basically the love for ourselves in many areas of our lives even in being flawed. When we can continue loving ourselves, being kind and compassionate to ourselves, and still be grateful every single day then yes, that is whole and so much more. T. Dench Patel, 11 January 2021, 17:18

Truth or Dare? True or False? If you are reading this, it comes with a disclaimer

So why is all this so important? Are you a foreigner somewhere? Maybe you’re a foreigner crowned with the new passport, maybe you will be travelling abroad, maybe your children will be travelling abroad one day, while others move to Britain, the British, South Africans, Germans, who knows who else will move to Australia, maybe you’re moving to South Korea one day, maybe your children will be. You don’t know yours or anyone’s destiny, but before you find out some hard truths, here’s Truth or Dare? True or False? Do you want to know what you or your children could face? Or would you rather have the unsaid dealt with now so that the future looks better?

Good Intentions or Good Judgement?

Certain things need to fall into place or be in place before certain pressures to do certain things can be considered a divine intervention or divine opportunity. Maybe if we lived authentically in society the right help can present itself but there is a high risk that you could be knocked down a lot more which can complicate the sighting of possible opportunities that could be heading one’s way … Let me see how I can explain… hmm, searching for an example, hmm still searching for an example …

The challenge of the wealthy – See their perspective

Have you seen the face of a child who receives a balloon from a cashier who decides to give kids a little gift when they come with their parents to the till? Yes, the cashier being my sister for many years has brought a smile on many children’s faces, but she remembers most the smile that kids from wealthy families give her as soon as the balloon which she blew up reaches their hands.

This is her account from working as a cashier at a pharmacy for many many years at one place some time back (she worked there for say … something like twenty years or longer).